Practice areas · Frankfurt am Main
Amicable divorce in Germany
When both of you want the same thing, a divorce need not be a fight. Agree on the terms and one lawyer can often see it through for both of you — quicker, cheaper and calmer than a contest. Here is how the amicable route actually works.
Four things to know first
Amicable means you agree on the terms
Not just that you both want out — that you have settled the consequences: maintenance, assets, the home and the children.
One lawyer is often enough
Only a represented party can file (§ 114 FamFG). If you agree, one lawyer files and the other simply consents — halving the legal cost.
The separation year still applies
Agreeing does not shorten it. A year of living apart is what the law reads as proof the marriage has broken down.
Pensions are split either way
The court shares the pension entitlements built up in the marriage by default — it is only excluded by a notarised agreement.
“Amicable” is about the terms, not just the wish
Both wanting to divorce is the easy part. A divorce is amicable in the legal sense when you also share an answer to what follows: maintenance between you, how assets are divided, what happens to the family home, and the arrangements for any children. That agreement is what turns a court case into a formality.
It does not mean nothing is negotiated. It means the negotiating happens between the two of you, with advice, rather than through opposing lawyers and a judge. Where you reach that point, the divorce is faster, cheaper and far less bruising — and you keep control of the outcome instead of handing it to a court.
Why one lawyer is usually enough
Before a German family court, a divorce petition can only be filed by someone who is legally represented (mandatory representation, § 114 FamFG). But that lawyer is only needed on one side. Where you agree, one spouse’s lawyer files the petition and the other spouse consents — and needs no lawyer of their own to do so. That single fact is what makes an amicable divorce so much cheaper than a contested one.
It has a limit worth being honest about: the consenting spouse cannot bring their own applications — on maintenance or custody, say — without their own lawyer. So one lawyer works precisely where you have already agreed on everything. Where you have not, a second lawyer is the safer choice, and we will tell you so.
What to settle — and in what form
The heart of an amicable divorce is the agreement you bring to it. Most couples put the consequences into a single divorce settlement agreement (Scheidungsfolgenvereinbarung): maintenance, the equalisation of gains, the home and its contents, and, where relevant, the arrangements for the children. Some of these need a notary to be binding, which is a feature, not a hurdle — it makes the agreement enforceable and hard to unpick later.
The point of doing this properly is that a clear, well-drafted agreement removes the very things couples otherwise end up fighting about. It is where the real work of an amicable divorce sits — and it draws directly on maintenance and the division of assets. Get it right, and the hearing is a short formality.
The pension split comes with the divorce
One part is not left to the couple to opt into: the pension rights adjustment (Versorgungsausgleich), which shares the pension entitlements each of you built up during the marriage. The court handles it as a matter of course in every divorce, amicable or not — it belongs to the procedure rather than sitting on top of it.
If you want to arrange it differently, or exclude it, that is possible — but only through a notarised agreement between you. It is one of the reasons even an amicable divorce benefits from advice: the default happens automatically unless you have deliberately, and formally, chosen otherwise.
What the amicable route buys you
Set against a contested divorce, the advantages are concrete. It costs less, because a single lawyer and a short hearing replace two sets of fees and a drawn-out fight. It is faster, once the separation year is behind you, because there is nothing left for a judge to decide. And it is calmer — which matters most where there are children, and where you will still have to deal with each other long after the decree.
It is not the right route for everyone. Where trust has gone, where assets are hidden, or where one of you holds far more information than the other, a firmer approach protects you better. An honest look at which of the two fits your situation is the first thing we do — and if the amicable path is realistic, it is almost always the better one. If you would rather keep the whole process remote, see how the online route fits alongside it.
Common questions
Do we really only need one lawyer?
Do we still have to wait out the separation year?
What has to be sorted out for a divorce to count as amicable?
What happens to the pension entitlements?
And the children — does an amicable divorce change custody?
Does an amicable divorce work if we married abroad or one of us lives abroad?
An amicable divorce is calm precisely because it is well prepared. If you are looking for an English-speaking divorce lawyer in Frankfurt to guide both of you through it, that is what this office does. You may also want our guide to the separation year and what a divorce costs.
Contact
Divorce without the fight
A confidential initial consultation, in English — whether the amicable route fits your situation, and the sensible next step. We reply personally, usually within one business day.
Sources
- Governing statutes (Bürgerliches Gesetzbuch, BGB): § 1565 and § 1566 (breakdown and the separation year), § 1567 (living apart), § 1614 (child support cannot be waived), § 1585c (agreements on maintenance) — gesetze-im-internet.de.
- Procedure: § 114 FamFG (mandatory representation and the single-lawyer consent), § 128 (personal hearing of both spouses), § 133 (details the petition must state) — gesetze-im-internet.de.